:-) CARS (-:
Question:
WHAT YOUR CAR SAYS ABOUT YOU….. Acura Integra – I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars. Acura Legend – I’m too bland for German cars. Acura NSX – I am impotent. Audi 90 – I enjoy putting out engine fires. Buick Park Avenue – I am older than 34 of the 50 states. Cadillac Eldorado – I am a very good Mary Kay salesman. Cadillac Seville – I am a pimp. Chevrolet Camaro – I enjoy beating the hell out of people. Chevrolet Chevette – I like seeing people’s reactions when I tell them have a ‘Vette. Chevrolet Corvette – I’m in a mid-life crisis. Chevrolet El Camino – I am leading a militia to overthrow the government. Chrysler Cordoba – I dig the rich Corinthian leather. Datsun 280Z – I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well. Dodge Dart – I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower. Dodge Daytona – I delivered pizza for four years to get this car. Ferrari Testarossa – I am known to prematurely ejaculate. Ford Explorer – I will not be caught dead in a mini van. Ford Fairmont – (See Dodge Dart). Ford Mustang – I slow down to 85 in school zones. Ford Crown Victoria – I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them. Geo Storm – I will start the 11th grade in the fall. Geo Tracker – I will start the 12th grade in the fall. Honda del Sol – I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all. Honda Civic – I have just graduated and have no credit. Honda Accord – I lack any originality and am basically a lemming. Infiniti Q45 – I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending. Isuzu Impulse – I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports. Jaguar XJ6 – I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year. Kia Sephia – I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp. Lamborghini Countach – I only have one testicle. Lincoln Town Car – I live for bingo and covered dish suppers. Mercury Grand Marquis (See above). Mercedes 500SL – I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph. Mercedes 560SEL – I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole. Mazda Miata – I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler. MGB – I am dating a mechanic. Mitsubishi Diamante – I don’t know what it means either. Nissan 300ZX – I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings. Oldsmobile Cutlass – I just stole this car and I’m going to make a fortune off the parts. Peugeot 505 Diesel – I am on the EPA’s Ten Most Wanted List. Plymouth Neon – I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena. Pontiac Trans AM – I have a switchblade in my sock. Porsche 911 Turbo – I have a three inch thingie. Porsche 944 – I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me. Rolls Royce Silver Shadow – I think Pat Buchanon is a tad bit too liberal. Saturn SC2 – (See Honda Civic). Subaru Legacy – I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu. Toyota Camry – I am still in the closet. Volkswagon Beetle – I still watch Partridge Family reruns. Volkswagon Cabriolet – I am out of the closet. Volkswagon Microbus – I am tripping right now. Volvo 740 Wagon – I am frightened of my wife.
Response:
>>Volkswagon Beetle – I still watch Partridge Family reruns. << >VW-Virtually Worthless
OK, now Bugsy (‘73, light blue, and *not* covered with psychedelic flower decals or peace signs) and I are really, really upset. Cut this out or we may be driven to road rage!! Judith
Response:
OK – For you, Judith, we’ll rename it to: Very Worthy. <g> I nearly met my maker in VW’s twice. Once when a Chevy Impala ran a stop and my dad’s Kharmann Ghia hit it and the second time in a bug when some pervert tried to shoot at us during a a road rage incident. Bruce //. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->OK, now Bugsy (‘73, light blue, and *not* covered with psychedelic flower >decals or peace signs) and I are really, really upset. Cut this out or we may >be driven to road rage!! >Judith
Response:
> Honda Civic – I have just graduated and have no credit.
Buh, huh… Sniff, sniff… <g> Oh well, in the US you don’t pay 100% taxes on cars… BTW, my new car application was approved. I don’t know what it’ll be yet though, but probably a nice, practical mini-van. — Best regards / Med vennlig hilsen, Aase Marit 
)))))) ("Aw-Se-Mareet" from Norway) http://w1.2380.telia.com/~u238000263/flaker/docs/index.html
Response:
>Chevrolet Chevette – I like seeing people’s reactions when I tell them >have a ‘Vette.
Hey, that’s mine! Borned in 1981 and still going strong. Well, not exactly *strong*, but in better shape than it’s owner. <G> Steve http://www.zoomnet.net/~steve
Response:
What about Saab’s??? And just what is so awful about mini-vans anyway?? Huh?? Huh?? <beg> Barbara Joy
Response:
You’re on the list, Barbara, just scroll down to SAAB Car Names Explained AUDI- Always Unsafe Designs Implemented BMW-Big Money Works Bought My Wife Brutal Money Waster Bimbette Motor Weapon Break My Window BUICK-Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer CHEVROLET- Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time DODGE-Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere DODGE – Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere FIAT- Failure in Italian Automotive Technology Fix It All the Time Fix it again, Tony! FORD – First On Recall Day FORD – First On Race Day First On Rust and Deterioration Fix Or Repair Daily Found On Road, Dead Fault Of R&D Fast Only Rolling Downhill Features O.J. and Ron’s DNA Found On Russian Dump GM- General Maintenance Great Mistake GMC- Garage Man’s Companion Got A Mechanic Coming? HONDA – Had One Never Did Again HYUNDAI-Hope You Understand Nothing’s Driveable And Inexpensive… MAZDA- Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along OLDSMOBILE-Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everywhere Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick’s Irregular Leftover Equipment PINTO – put in new transmission often PONTIAC – poor old Neanderthal thinks its a Cadillac SAAB-Send Another Automobile Back Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown. TOYOTA-Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto VOLVO- Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object VW-Virtually Worthless Bruce //. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->What about Saab’s??? >And just what is so awful about mini-vans anyway?? Huh?? Huh?? <beg> >Barbara Joy
Response:
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